My Sex Trekking Parody
by Didget
Summary: Sex Trek On 'Heading down South': It's Totally Unforgiveable actual title . Rated T & warning there are mentions of femslash, yuoi and three somes/four somes. If you don't like, don't read!


**Title: Sex Trek On 'Heading down South': It's Totally Unforgiveable.**

**Author: Didget **

**Fandom: Star trek: Voyager (PARODY!)**

**Disclaimer: I own my parody, that is all :P**

**Rating: T (for 'Terrible' amounts of ridiculous sex ;) **

**Pairings: Nailwax & Banana, Capital Walkaway & Kiss, Capital Walkaway & Kiss & 2balls, Capital Walkaway & Kiss & 2balls & Kim my Boy, and one sided Capital Walkaway & Choky. **

**Warning: Yes there is some girl on girl and some boy on boy action (tho I'm not sure whether Kim my Boy is actually a boy). And mention of three-somes and four-somes. If you don't like, don't read!**

**Author's Note: this is a totally inappropriate and immature parody of Star trek; Voyager. If an outrageous and continuous referee to sex upsets you, read a different story. **

_**Second Author's Note: My Sex Trek Names & Terms; (in order of mention)**_

_Voyager – Going Down South ;]_

_Neelix – Nailwax_

_Chakotay - Choky_

_Captain Catherin Janeway - Capital Caffeine Walkaway._

_Tuvok - 2balls_

_Ponfar – Pancake Car (ride)_

_Harry Kim – Kim my Boy_

_Warp core - Warped cord_

_B'Elanna - Banana_

_Kes – Kiss_

_Delta – Shelta_

_Quadrant - Quad_

_Ocampa – OhCumium_

**Story Starts Here! - Sex Trek On 'Heading down South': It's Totally Unforgiveable.**

_***Choky's point of view.***_

Nailwax stared at me from across the table.

**"You're running away from your feelings Choky. It clear to everyone you want Capital Walkway.**

**"I do but…"**

**"But what!"** Nailwax demanded. **"It not like she's having sex with anyone else."**

**"No it's exactly like she's having sex with someone else." **I hissed.** "How do you think 2balls survived his Pancake Car (ride) without dying?" **

**"I heard he shackled Kim my Boy to the warped cord & and had some crazy sex with him."** said Banana, sitting down beside Nailwax and pulling him into her lap. I looked away, feeling sick as Banana began to kiss & bite the side of Nailwax's neck.

**"Yeah, well I have to go."** I said standing & walking hurriedly away.

**"Have a meeting with Capital do you?"** Called out Banana mockingly, the mess-hall around her filling with laughter.

**"No!"** I yelled back. Trying not to run through corridors to fast, I arrived at Capital Walkaways office with not a second to spare. Trying not to look breathless I slowly knocked on her door & waited.

_***Capital Walkaways point of view.***_

Hearing a knock on the door, I quickly slipped my uniform top back on & gestured to Kiss to crawl under the desk. Composing my face I instructed whoever it was to enter. Not to my surprise, it was Choky.

**"Can I talk to you about a personal matter Capital?"** He asked quietly, not quite meeting my eyes.

**"Yes, and if it's that personal please call me Caffeine."** I said watching chokeholds innocent face carefully.

**"Is the rumour true?"**

**"Which rumour?"** I asked, trying to ignore Kiss's lips & hands.

**"Is it true-"** He asked, looking me in the face for the first time**. "-You & 2balls had sex during his pancake-car ride?"**

Looking deep into chokeholds eyes I smiled. **"Well we did but I wasn't the only one. You see I alone couldn't manage to 2balls, so Kiss and I switched every couple of hours or so." **Enjoying the look of complete shock on Chokeholds face, I decided to push his expectations beyond what he could handle. **"If we were both up to it, sometimes we even had a three-some... And once a four-some when Kim my Boy decided to get involved." **

"**But isn't that… like illegal?" **Asked Choky, a despite kinda hope etched across his face.

"**Yeah probably, but we're in the middle of the Shelta Quad, so who's gonna stop us?" **I said cheerfully, as I idly shrugged off my top again**. "Now if you excuse me, I have a horny little OhCumium to look after."** Amused I watched Choky leaving the office, there'd be some quite fantastic rumours spreading across the ship like wildfire by next shift.

**Second Authors Note:**** This story will be continued whenever I feel like it :D (Which means it won't be continued at all probably)**

**Please review, if only to tell me how much you regret reading this story ;]**


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